Studentism #3

"Your hair looks like somebody chopped off a dog's tail."

Thanks, kid. Thanks.

Studentism #1

I think I am going to start a themed post called Studentisms. They will include conversations that I hear in the classroom. Enjoy!

Student: Ms. Beck, I think I broke your SmartBoard!
Me: Okay, you owe the school $5,000.
Student: No problem. I got ten G at home.

Explanation: All Native Alaskans who are shareholders in ASRC (Arctic Slope Regional Corporation) received a dividend check of $10,000 this past December.

This is certainly something you wouldn't hear in the Lower 48.

My students write about beauty.

Sometimes my students write amazing things. Really amazing things, like they have wisdom beyond their years or something.

Enjoy.

And then sometimes you get writing like this, which at the very least is humorous. Oh, teenagers...

Chill, Mother Nature. Well, don't chill, but you know what I mean.

What is this -- the arctic or something? Wind chill around 65 below?

C'mon, Mother Nature... Calm down so I can take Quya outside for potty breaks without my getting frostbite within a minute.

you got homework, boy!

Called a parent tonight.

Father: "What? My son has homework?"

Me: "Yes."

Then father proceeds to kick kid off of every possible electronic device...

"GET OFF THAT IPAD! NO IPHONE, NO COMPUTER, NO NOTHING! YOU GOT HOMEWORK, BOY!"

Man, the kid's gonna love me tomorrow.

"people that needs happiness"

These are the kind of paragraphs that make me love teaching. This one calls for a "bless his little heart." He obviously isn't from the U.S.

Time Travel, Angels, and Explosive Puppy Diarrhea

Today I fly back to Barrow, God-willing, of course. I hear the weather is an iffy thing in various parts of the U.S., but so far everything is a go for my route.

Speaking of my route... Check it out.

Atlanta to Seattle
Seattle to Anchorage
[long middle-of-the-night layover with a not entirely potty-trained puppy]
Anchorage to Fairbanks
Fairbanks to Prudhoe Bay
Prudhoe Bay to Barrow

It's roughly 24 hours of travel. And honestly, it feels more like time travel, and let me tell you -- time travel is nothing to sneeze at. It's quite exhausting.

Granted, I am only time traveling back four hours, but still. Transitioning from east coast time to Alaska time wears a girl out.

So, here it goes.

Honestly, all I want is for Quya to not have explosive diarrhea at the Anchorage airport like she did two weeks ago.

** This post is dedicated to the stranger (angel?) who saw my distress at the airport and cleaned up Quya's disgusting mess by baggage claim #3. Thank you.